We are beginning to sell oysters again, after being shut down by Covid since March 2020. Here are some guidelines I have developed over the years to help make a dirty tough job–mostly a joy.
Guideline 1
Always be clear about who is doing the heavy lifting.
Guideline 2
Understand that there is no bad weather,
only poor wardrobe choices.
Have boots for every possible combination of
number, weight and layering of socks.
Guideline 3 (possibly the most important)
Always know where your suspenders are.
The only latrine out there for a lady oyster farmer
is a bucket, and if your suspenders end up
inside instead of outside,
you will still have to put your bib overalls
back on.
Guideline 4
Get over any notion of staying clean or dry.
All that matters is warm, which usually means
4 tops, 2 pants, 3 pairs of socks,
insulated gloves and boot liners
before you get to the outer wear.
Guideline 5
Emphasize coffee and chocolate.
Soup, peanut butter and fruit are good in a hot lunch,
but know your priorities.
Guideline 6
Also get over any resistance to housecleaning.
Everything wants a home,
and deserves at least a mostly clean one.
Guideline 7
Extend the notion of “heavy lifting” as necessary.
Struggling to unwind a rope from a propeller qualifies.
Guideline 8
Stay happy.
There are actually many worse ways
to spend a day.
Although sometimes I must admit I dream of building a drum or doing a Journey Oracle reading while sitting near the woodstove–a cup of coffee and a few chocolate balls nearby. As I said, I know my priorities.
